The Internet Already Is Cumming Themselves Over The Idea Of Michelle Obama Running For President In 2020

Honestly last night was one of my most fun nights trolling social media. Tears everywhere, people questioning their whole lives and the entire Democratic process our country was founded on…as someone who enjoys watching the human condition and how we respond to different things, it’s a treat. And I think people immediately clinging to any straws of hope now that we live in a world where President Donald Trump is a thing is another interesting part of that. I’ve mentioned before that Kmarko and I use a magic tool (might be witchcraft) that shows us things going viral on the internet and the feed there shows that people are going nuts over these articles about Michelle Obama running in 2020, sharing them 10x more than other articles, clinging to the idea of her like a life preserver to get them out of the choppy waters of election results. Doom and gloom everywhere over a President elect who frankly no one has any idea what he’ll do when in office. And Michelle Obama is the beacon in the distance for people who were so overconfident that they would be victorious this year, a glimmer of hope if they can only survive President Trump’s (unfairly) presumed reign of terror.

And the thing is…why is Michelle Obama the thing they’re clinging to? I get she’s popular with a certain crowd, she’s a woman and a lot of the country has a hard-on for seeing that breakthrough happen, but what makes her particularly qualified to do this job? Because she lived in the same house as the President for eight years she’s somehow going to fix every misstep in our country that got us to this point? It’s fool’s gold for weak people who can’t accept the fact that they lost an election and now have to ride it out and see where it goes. Instead of wondering how Donald Trump may somehow bridge the gap and become a real human instead of a lightning rod, they’d rather fantasize about imaginary worlds four years from now where another wife of a beloved President will ride in on a steed and save us all. There isn’t a quick fix and there isn’t going to be a President thrust into office because the media, liberal hivemind Twitter, and shitty fawning episodes of Broad City breathlessly told us all that “This is what the country really needs.”

It’s 2016. We elected Donald Trump. Quit the bawwing, shut the fuck up about what could possibly happen in 2020 and maybe think more about how we can get this country back on track now in the world we actually live in.